• wolf raised by accountants
• senpai finally notices you exist
• everybody in the world wakes up with a really awful tattoo in a discrete location that no future employer will ever see

• alternate reality where Northern short-tail shrews evolve as dominant form of life on Earth
• crematorium / ice cream parlor joint business venture
• entire book of bad writing prompts

your child has autism

this is not because of you

it is minecraft’s fault

this is a haiku

it is about nothingness

colonoscopy